Homelink figured out!
After reading the threads on Homelink, I was almost convinced our unit was defective. Then I re-read this thread and tried following ALL the instructions one more time. The Quick Start Guide and Ody Manual are almost written like there are two seperate processes, one for non-rolling code openers and one for rolling code openers.
The way to get it to work is to follow ALL the instructions, from start to finish, exactly as written, no skipping steps or starting in the middle. I had the engine off, but the key was turned to the "on" position (all dash lights on, etc.).
Seems the Homelink unit has to learn your remote first (this is the first six steps of the Quick Start Guide). After it learns the remote, then it can learn the rolling code part. I was not getting it to work because I was jumping right into step 7 of the Quick Start Guide because I knew mine was a rolling code door opener.
I think our VIN was even in the range mentioned in the service bulletin.
Anyway, good news, I got mine to work.